Obviously, She Is Not Me

Futile Love Letters is a means for me to express my thoughts to Nick, my ex-fiancé. He may or may not see them and is unlikely to even read them. In any case, I don't expect him to answer. This is just an uncomplicated way for me to symbolically keep contact with him. So, until then, there’s this.



Kermit and Miss Piggy dressed to the nines. Obviously, she is not me.
Kermit! Obviously, She Is Not Me
I Lovey Dovey Love You

On August 31, 2020, I discovered that Nicholas, my ex-fiancé, started dating again, so I created “Futile Love Letters”. A collection of letters inside my journal where I can address to him my thoughts and feelings. Of course, I hope that he finds them, but if he does not, at least those feelings are out in the universe and not weighing me down.


Now that he is holding another girl, and obviously she is not me, I find myself trying to catch my breath again. However, I know when he closes his eyes, it’s my face he’ll continue to see. This song, sung by Zara Larsson, is perfect for how I’m feeling about all this. She is Not Me. She will never have you like I did, and she doesn’t have my name. She can try to act like it, but she’ll never be the same.


zarra larsson she is not me video cover photography

Zara Larsson

She Is Not Me

She doesn’t love you like I do. She doesn’t have my name.
However, she tries to act like it, she’ll never be the same.
But she’s new, and she’s beautiful. You’ve never been in a fight.
Oh yeah, it’s awfully perfect now, but you just know deep inside…


She is not me. She is not me. She is not me, baby. She is not me.

Does she make you feel wanted? Like I did? Make you feel like you’re the one thing that matters?
You let her head rest on your chest, but when you close your eyes…
You’ll be seeing my face again. I’ll be crossing your mind. You’ll be dreaming of places we went. And then you’ll wake up to find…

She is not me. She is not me. She is not me, remember. That she is not me.
She is not me. She’s not me.

Said I wonder now. Yeah, I wonder how you’ve been. Are you happy?
Is she still the one? Are you having fun? Is it for real, baby?
Cause I’ll be waiting here, another week, or month or year if you’re lonely.
God, I wish I knew everything about the two of you, won’t you tell me?

Does she have any humor? Does she laugh at your jokes? Can she look past the rumors?
Does she know how it goes? Hey, or is it none of my business?
Do you go to the movies? Do you make out in the park? Do you stay up for hours?
And just talk and talk?

Hey, or is it none of my business?

Does she know about the bracelets? There were two of a kind? Did you save, did you save it,
Like I did mine? Hey, or is it none of my business?
Would it make any difference if I got you alone? If I called, would you listen?
Would you hang up the phone?

Hey, or is it none of my business?

None of my business. Is it none of my business? None of my business. Is it none of my business?
She’s not me. And she’ll never be, never be, never be…

Until We Meet Again

Licensed to YouTube by ~ SME, UMG (on behalf of Universal Music AB); Sony ATV Publishing, Kobalt Music Publishing, ASCAP, AMRA, CMRRA, UMPI, and 17 Music Rights Societies

I Lovey Dovey Love You

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